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Latest limericks, page 3

There was a young lady of Spain
Who couldn't go out in the rain;
For she'd lent her umbrella
To Queen Isabella,
Who never returned it again.

limerick from Punch, or The London Charivari (30 March 1904)Report problemRelated quotes
Added by Dan Costinaş
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There was a sweet Miss from Kent
who got into trouble with her rent.
she spent all her cash
on nothing but trash
and now she's fasting for Lent.

limerick by from Everyone Loves a LimerickReport problemRelated quotes
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There once was a drunk from Dover
who fell asleep in the clover.
he woke up and said,
what's this on my head
The cows had splattered him all over.

limerick by from Everyone Loves a LimerickReport problemRelated quotes
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I remember dear Maude Skinner
Who ate beans, every night for dinner.
When she ate enough,
she would start to puff
and everyone was a winner.

limerick by from Everyone Loves a LimerickReport problemRelated quotes
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Edward Lear

There once was a lady of Guam
Who said, "Now the sea is so calm,
I'll swim out, for a lark."
But she met a large shark.
Let us now sing the Ninetieth Psalm!

limerick by from A Book of Nonsense (1846)Report problemRelated quotes
Added by Dan Costinaş
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In a cage at Saskatchewan Zoo
lived a cranky old cockatoo,
he was talking all day
and had something to say
to the resident kangaroo.

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A female and young cockatiel
had just finished her evening meal.
When an image occurred
of a masculine bird
who had feathers and sexual appeal.

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There was an old granny named Flo
she came down with gangrene on her toe,
so she went to the dentist
who was known as adventist
and he said 'it's a tooth for a toe.'

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He was scheduled to get a new kidney,
though he tried to obtain one from Whitney,
fifty million car parts
but no kidneys or hearts,
so he got his new kidney in Sydney.

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Any doctor today must have stealth,
as he deals with his patients' ill health.
Let me tell you, my friend
what goes on in the end,
it's a state-sanctioned transfer of wealth.

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