There was a young lady from Ealing
Who had a peculiar feeling;
She then noticed a louse
On the back of a mouse
As over her leg, they were stealing.
There was an Old Person of Dover,
Who rushed through a field of blue Clover;
But some very large bees,
Stung his nose and his knees,
So he very soon went back to Dover.
In the Chinese county of Xiao Xing
was a poet by the name Hu Ling
when writing a song -
he never went wrong -
for in Chinese, all the words are rhyme Ming.
There was an Old Person of Hurst,
Who drank when he was not athirst;
When they said, "You'll grow fatter,"
He answered, "What matter?"
That globular Person of Hurst.
There was a stud on the net called “Big Banyon, ”
He had a tool the size of a cannon,
And every lady ran
From this humongous man
Till he met a gal surfers called “Grand Canyon.”
There was an young Irish lad
Who was often quite bad
He took out this young lass
And meant to stick it in her ass
But he missed, and now he is a dad
There once was a sailor from York,
Who never would eat with a fork,
Then he changed his whole life
When he slipped with a knife
Now his eyes are as sharp as a hawk.
A poet who always wrote limericks
Was known as a terrible cleverdick.
They said that her verse
Was sarcastic and terse
Or silly and smart-arsed - you take your pick!
There once was a man named Muldoon,
Who couldn’t carry a tune.
He’d sing all day,
If he had his way,
But his wife made him swallow a broom!
There happened to be a lad named Larry
whose skills mathematical were quite scary
at school he couldn't doodle
all he said was Google
now he's gotten so rich - I tell you, it's filthy.