There was an Old Person of Burton,
Whose answers were rather uncertain;
When they said, 'How d'ye do?'
He replied, 'Who are you?'
That distressing Old Person of Burton.
There was a guy called Dick,
Who was short like a limerick,
Who tried to climb a wooden wall
But soon began to fly and fall
When hit by a big blue brick!
There was a very pious old man,
The wise old fool that governs Iran,
He would preach and he’d prate
About governing his state,
‘Til the people said, “You can’t, WE CAN! ”
There was lad who said: 'Anytime;
Early morn, af'noon or prime time,
This activity's the best
Above all the rest -
Anytime's sex-time, no crime!'
There once was a dog named Spot,
Who had one stripe and one dot.
He ran at the park,
Had a loud bark,
And one bone was all he got.
A dodgy young shepherd from Greece
Who wanted his flock to increase
Just stole a few rams
Along with some lambs
But got nicked by the local police.
Descartes, in a bar, did hear
'Last call, you want a last beer? '
But when put on the spot
he quipped 'I think...not'
and POOF, he just disappeared!
A blogger and a poet in a stew
Traded places to note the other’s view.
Said the blogger, “I’ll site it.“
“I’ll sight it.” Said the poet.
As they bantered on—the souper line grew.
There was a young man from Luton
stealing suits from Aquascutum
but none of them fit
for his belly was big
and Marquees are all that would suit him
There was an old lady from Cuba,
Who loved playing a big old bass tuba.
But Fidel said 'oh no,
That tubas got to go.'
Now she plays jazz guitar in Aruba.